Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Parent-Teacher Conference Day

With parent-teacher conferences just around the bend, I thought I'd prepare by sharpening up on my euphemism skills, and share a few of them with all of you. Parent-teacher conferences. One giant euphemism for your kid is a freakshow.

Euphemism:"Your child struggles to navigate social situations."

Translation: Your kid is a socially inept freak, and is going to be a loser in high school.


Euphemism: Your child has some difficulty attending to the lesson.

Translation: Your kid can't concentrate for shit, get him/her on meds NOW.


Euphemism: Sometimes ___________(insert child's name) needs reminders to raise his/her hand.

Translation: Your kid doesn't shut the hell up, ever.


Euphemism: At times, we've noticed some mean-spirited behavior displayed by your child.

Translation: Your kid's an ass.


Euphemism: At times your child struggles with managing his/her emotions.

Translation: Your kid's a cry baby. Man up.

Doesn't it make you wonder what your teachers used to say about you? I can only imagine what mine said about me...

1 comment:

  1. haaahahah i can totally relate. i'll keep you posted on any of my euphemisms...

    ReplyDelete