LHS Ten Year Reunion!!!!

It has been months since my last post. (I am soyyy sorry). But, if ever there was a time for a blog revival...it is now! A lot can happen in ten years. For my students, this is their entire lifetime. For me, ten years ago at this time, I was a college freshman having come home for Thanksgiving for the very first time. I have endured many changes in the past decade. Certainly far too much to sum up in this blog post. But, to name a few: I went to college, started a career, experienced new people, and learned many, many important life lessons. And, yet. In the context of certain situations. (i.e: a highschool reunion), it feels like nothing has changed at all. It's almost odd in a way, it's as if the last ten years haven't even occurred.

 Last night I attended my ten year high school reunion. Not only was I an attendee, but alongside two others I planned the event. And it has to be said. The night was a smashing success, I could not have asked for a more unbelievably fun night if I had tried. A ten year reunion is one of those milestone moments in life that you hear about, or see portrayed in movies, and last night I experienced it firsthand.  For one night, I was a twenty-eight year old high school senior. And, I can't think of anything that could have made me feel happier.

The green and white balloons, (Go Lancers!), the late 90's/early 00's songs played by the DJ, and the genuine joy that was felt around the room all contributed to the amazingness of the night. (Well, all of that and the open bar).  Highschool reunions have the potential to be awkward. (Alcohol helps). There could be the fear of seeing an old flame, friends fallen out of touch, and yet--at the LHS Reunion, everyone was genuinely thrilled to be reunited together.

I am a lucky lady to have remained in touch with so many of my high school friends. (In fact, in 2013 I will be attending four high school weddings, two of which both the bride and groom graduated from high school together). And yet, there were still people who came to the reunion that I could not have predicted how excited I would be to see. Faces that I hadn't seen in years, and once the conversation began, it was like we were back in 2002, standing at our lockers in D-Hall.

What happened after the reunion was the best part. (Well, after the after-party, and the after-after-party).  It was the e-mails, texts, and Facebook messages that followed not only thanking me for planning the reunion, but also to share how good it was to re-connect. This is the best part. I came away from the reunion, feeling rejuvenated in my current friendships, and rekindled old ones.

I know. I am an interesting breed of human. Not all people care this much about highschool. And not all people would feel sad when highschool (and the reunion) ended. But, this is me. I can't begin to express the amount of fun I had on Friday night, or the actual feeling of sadness I have now that it's over. Do I really have to wait another ten years to do this again?

Ending this post feels appropriate with the following quote. A close friend of mine found two girls who he did not recognize at the reunion. Approaching them both he said. "Alright, let's get this over with, who the hell are you?"

Ah, I'll love you forever LHS. Thank you for introducing me to some of my favorite people in all of my life. To everyone who came last night, thank you for making it the actual best time ever.

Trash is dumped, and so are you!

Greetings from the last day of August. It's hard to believe how fast this summer has gone by. Every time I think about school being back in session next week, I actually want to cry small tears of sadness. This is not because I dislike my job, but rather an indicator of just how much I love summer.

It's been a really great summer filled with freedom, adventure, good times, hilarious times, and even some sexy times. Tonight, I write to you with one of the "not so good" times. And that is: Getting dumped.  I use the term "dumped" loosely, because the dumper was not my actual boyfriend. (We never made it that far), but he was someone that I was seeing on a weekly basis, investing my time and feelings. We had a real good run while it lasted. And, in the end this fellow, (who is really a lovely, stand up-person) felt this was a timing issue. I realize this sounds code for, "He's just not that into you." But, I don't think that was the case. It involves more detail, but in the small chance this is ever seen by him, well...I will keep that to myself.

We had a blasty-blast together, and it is disappointing to see something like that end. No matter what though, I appreciate that he had the courage to tell me in person. He did not text me, e-mail me, or even worse...phase me out. No. He manned up! (And broke the news to me over a Bacardi and Diet Coke). After "the talk", we chatted for a while, laughing and having fun. Moral of the story: You can dump me, and I'll still have fun with you immediately after.

 We stood outside the bar, trying to find the right words to say goodbye. Standing close together, about to hug, as a small man walked by us. The man stopped in front of us and said, "You guys make a  really good couple!" The man walked away, and we burst out laughing.  OF COURSE, I had just been told that I made a good couple with a guy who had litreally just dumped me twenty minutes earlier. Oh, timing. You are quite literally everything. The dumper (for lack of a better word), turned to me and said, "Yeah, I'm probably going to tweet about that. And, I replied--I'll probably be blogging about that too." And, with that we hugged one last time, and I walked away.

Summer Time Happenings

Last night at my post-kickball game drinks, one of my teammates asked what I've been doing with all of my free time, a la summer vacation. (Clearly, this time has not been spent blogging--I promise to write more often). And so, here I am with some summer time updates.

1. First and foremost, The Judys got engaged!! For those of you that don't know, the Judys are my older brother, Jeremy and his fiancé Christine. I am very excited for them. It was amazing to celebrate at Long Beach Island on Sunday with both of our families. I am so happy for my Judys!!! (Also, I made Judy pinkie-swear that I get to bring a date to his wedding.

2. On Tuesday night I participated in my very first GROUPER  experience with Becca Girl and Brookie. Grouper is a group dating website. (Becca secretly signed me up for this while she was over one afternoon). Grouper sends you and two friends on a "group date," with three guys who are all friends. In theory, this could be really great way to meet someone! Unfortunately, in our case it was not. While these guys were very sweet and friendly, they were not really for us. All was not lost though, as a lesbian named Katie found her way into our group date. She took a real liking to Becky, as she draped her arm around Becky's shoulder. While Becky may not have left our grouper meeting her future husband, who knows...maybe she met her wife!

3. On Wednesday night, I was at a friend from high school, (Heath F)'s birthday happy hour. While there, Becky and I met a group of guys. When I learned that they were only twenty-three, it was hard not to wince a little. But, here's the real kicker: These boys went to my higshchool. That's right!!! Of all the boys in the bar, the five that talked to us were members of Livingston High School's graduating class of 2007. Did our night end taking a hummer limo to a strip club with a group of twenty-three year old guys? Well, I'll never tell. But, Facebook will.

4. The LHS '07 boys asked me what year I graduated. 2002, I reluctantly said. Last week a Facebook group for our ten year reunion went out. I CANNOT WAIT!!!!

5. My gig as cooking counselor is going well! My hours are amazing, and working two days a week is actually a dream come true. Also, I lead a cooking (baking) class. Contrary to popular belief, I am not the camp chef.

6. On Wednesday afternoon, I was walking down 77th Street, when a woman sitting outside of a store told me that I had a positive aura. She also said more lovely things, and thus, she lured me in. As it turns out, she is a psychic.  And, as my friend Rweissypantz said, I am a psychic's wet dream. Using tarot cards, she told me the date of my engagement, the year of my marriage, and how many kids I will have. Do I believe in psychics? I don't know. Do you?

Sure, I've been up to other things too--like beaches, Shevitz family vacations, a Rhode Island wedding, and an Andyman and Brent reunion of sorts. It has been a great start to my favorite season in the world. And, it gets even better. This weekend the Schodack crew is heading to the place that will forever hold a spot in all of our summer hearts. Camp Schodack, here we come!!!

A Ten Kilometer Journey

On Saturday morning I ran my very first 10K. I did not know what to expect as to what this experience would be like. And I was nervous! (Mostly about having to poop mid-run). I can tell you this: Any nerves and anxiety I had over this run were well worth it! It was an incredible experience. And I can now understand why people run half marathons, and marathons year after year, because this feeling...is just that good.

There were many amazing things about this race that made it special. To start, it was a ladies only 10k. Girl Power!!! There was something truly empowering about running through the streets of Manhattan, and  Central Park with a pack of 8,000 women. I felt proud to be a woman and proud to be a part of that group

I ran this race with my best gal--Becca Girl. And, even though she ran faster than me, and I literally watched her pony-tail from afar, it was a special experience we shared together.

I listened to three songs on repeat the entire hour and four minutes that I ran. Mmhmm. I pep talked myself to keep going many times. I felt excitement as I watched spectators cheer us on. I kept my eyes on the girl in front of me who had the words, "I'm not a quitter and neither are you. Now you keep running," written on her back. (This sign literally motivated me to keep running, and not stop to walk once). I nearly cried when almost a mile of the course was uphill. But each time I ran past the mile markers, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and finally crossing the finish line...the excitement, and feeling of true accomplishment grew.

I am proud of myself. It's a rare thing to announce this past the age of ten. But, it's true. I feel proud. I put in a lot of hard work to get to this point, and it paid off. It's a lesson as old as time. If you work hard for something, you can achieve what you want. After a long day at school, did I want to come home, drop off my stuff, and go on a four mile run? Hell no. But, am I glad that I forced myself to do this?  Hell yeah! Because, the feeling I felt when I crossed the finish line was indescribable, and far more emotional than I had ever anticipated. It was a mixture of pride, happiness, relief and pure elation.  The entirely positive feelings I felt when I crossed the finish line outweighed any of the negatives that took place during the course of the race. It made all  of the training and challenges completely worth it. Even though, I did not come in 1st place, (I came in 3,083rd), I still feel like I won something. I won the realization that hard work really and truly pays off in the end. Thank you Ladies Only 10k, you've made quite an impact on me.

Merry June!

Did you think I had forgotten about Go Fish? I hadn't, and I haven't.  I have just been busier in the last few months than I have been in what feels like all of my life. And, well. I guess that's a good thing.

We made it to June. (HOLLAAAA!!) I wait all year for this moment. I am a summer time girl. I love the sunshine and the warmth. And, I like myself best in shorts, skirts, and flip-flop tanned. For most people the end of the year means December. But when you're a student or a teacher, your "year" revolves around the school calendar. Since I went into teaching six years ago after graduating from college, (and have been in school since I was two and a half), I simply don't know any other way of life. My year starts in September and wraps itself up in June.  Summer holds actual meaning for me. And truly... I wouldn't have it any other way. With just ten days left in the fourth grade, I feel it is safe to say that I did it! A congratulatory YAY is in order.  I survived my first year in a new place, despite many initial reservations and hesitations.

A lot has happened this past year, both personally and professionally. And, I've come a long way from the girl who cried for the first two weeks in September because I was homesick for The Center for Ants. Yes, I still miss my old school. But in a different, much less painful way.

When thinking about another school year coming to a close, it's hard not to be reflective on the happenings of this past year. When I started at my new school back in September, the first person who wished me luck via text message is no longer in my life. (As it turned out, he had a girlfriend while we were doing it). And once this information was brought to my attention, I didn't stick around.

Hindsight is really a magical thing. It allows you to see all the things that you couldn't see while you were in the thick of things. Hindsight and I agree on a lot of things over that relationship. The biggest one being: Cheers to it being done. I have grown wiser since, and yes--I do feel smarter about how I'd like to handle myself going forward.  Later in this same year I had a pseudo relationship. In the end I had to do something really difficult. I had to end it.  And while I do think fondly of this person, somewhere deep down I knew we weren't quite right for each other. And no matter what.... I still think I would rather be the dumpee then the dumper. I don't like knowing I am the source of anyone's hurt. And at the very least when I am the rejected one, I can write an angry blog post.

Things at work were challenging at times but as the year went on, I made real friends, and developed real bonds with my students. And, in ten days---I will really miss those kids. (Well, most of them).

Next Saturday, I will be partaking in my first ever 10K with my Becca Girl. I'm proud of the hard work we've put in in preparation for this event. Now, I just pray that I don't have to poop mid-run.

This year has brought me many great times and things. And, also some not as great times and things. It is comforting to know that with each experience, I grow and learn, just a little bit. And, I guess you really can't ask for much more than that.

Happy May!!!

Helloooooo Friends!

It is May, hooray!!!!!! I promise to write a long, lovely post soon.

Also...

Do you know what a dream it is for me that the three leading ladies of Beverly Hills, 90210 all have their own reality shows? That's Tori, Jennie and Shannen. Check it.

I love 2012.

American Reunion

I rarely use my blog as a forum to discuss movies. But, I feel a strong urge to do so. On Friday, I saw American Reunion with my sister. (Sidenote: We were literally the only two in the theater not on a date). I was very excited to see American Reunion. Just to be clear: I rarely get excited about seeing a movie. I usually decide if I want to see a movie based on how long it is. (My favorite movies are ninety minutes long).

However, I feel a deep tie to this movie, as it is a cultural icon from my generation. After all, the original American Pie movie centers around the class of 1999. I was a freshman in highschool in June of 1999, and I idolized my seniors (Class of ’99). 

American Pie (The Fourth) was the perfect blend of comedy, raunch and nostalgia. While the movie does not spend too long at the actual reunion, the music that plays while there is magical. Naturally, music that came out in the late 90’s was the highlight. Aka, my late middle school and early high school years, and I ask you...what could be better?

In addition, the movie did a tasteful job of balancing a semi-graceful entrance into adulthood, while not forgetting to look back on the past. And by sheer virtue, any movie that makes me feel nostalgic for highschool is okay with me. And, with my ten year highschool reunion later this year, this movie slid right into my reality. 

American Reunion also did a fantastic job of poking fun at the ridiculousness of the 90's. And, yet this movie has a modern twist--with references to JDate for one. Lastly, it was lovely to see my old favorite characters back together again. (Especially since many of them became train wrecks in their personal lives post American Pie).

In short, go see this movie. You won't regret it.

Oh, heyy Steve Sanders!

Greeeetings from Spring Break!!

It's been an amazing week off, and I still have one remaining week of freedom. Hallelujah! I'd like to take a moment and write about the biggest highlight of my vacation thus far. And, that is meeting Ian Ziering. Better known to all of you as Steve Sanders, Beverly Hills 90210 alum. Allow me to set the stage.

I was walking to the East Village to meet my great pals, Jeff and Nate for dinner at Spice Cove, fine Indian cuisine. (Contrary to popular belief I can eat things other than grilled chicken slathered in ketchup). En route to dinner, I received a phone call from my roommate. Upon picking up the phone, I could hear the excitement in her voice. She told me that Ian Ziering was promoting his new skin care line at her gym. Like the great roommate that she is, she told him all about me. My love for 90210, that I know the entire casts' birthday, that I have written multiple letters to castmates, and that there is a life-size poster of Luke Perry on my wall. He said, "tell her to come." Yes, that's right. Ian Ziering personally requested my presence. I had to get there... immediately. The minute dinner was done, I bolted back uptown to Equinox gym. When I arrived, there he was. Steve Sanders, sans his blonde Jew-fro. What I found instead was an extremely personable, friendly, forty-eight year old man. I introduced myself, to which he replied, "The girl who knows more than I do about 90210!" He gave me a big hug, then said, "We have to get a picture, and so we did. I smiled for the camera, and I haven't stopped smiling since.

Happy Stoop Sitting Season!!!

Let the stoop sitting begin! Stoop sitting season is now officially underway. With the recent change of weather, (thank God, I love you Spring), my most favorite past time can be resumed. Me + a best friend + East 9th Street stoop + frozen yogurt. (Optional)= Love.

Sing us a Song, Piano Bar

Despite the fact that I just wrote an entire blog about how excited I am to catch up on sleep, I love nothing more than springing forward for Daylight Savings. Yes. I lose an hour of sleep. But so what! (Pink anyone?) If that means sixty-five degree days in March, and daylight until seven pm, well...count me in!

Last night was spent at a rowdy, hilarious, and perfect piano bar. I have never felt like more of a New York City girl in my life, than I did sitting in that hidden gem, with my best friends. I was there with my best camp girls. (Sans Meelzy--we missed you). As each hit kept being played, song, after song, we all knew we were in the right place. A place where we were free to sing and clap as loudly as we wanted. This place was magical.

What I also loved about this piano bar, was the next-stage-of-life-girlies who sat next to us. All of them had rings on their fingers, and one of them was pregnant. (Yes, I realize that girls my age also wear rings on their fingers, and give birth, but none of my camp friends are there yet). They looked like they were in their early to mid-thirties, having a girls night out. We instantly became piano bar besties. They sang with us, they clapped with us, and they cheered with us. They asked us how we all knew each other, we told them...sleepaway camp. (They told us college). As we bonded over singing TLC's Waterfalls, Lady Gaga and more, I have never felt more at peace, or more at home than I did at the piano bar. And, as for all this singing (screaming), I did last night? Well...my voice has never sounded better.

Spring Break!!

In just six days, the start of my spring break begins. And, I couldn't be more excited. Two weeks off from six-thirty am wake up calls?! Sign me up! What remains interesting to me is what "Spring Break," has meant to me as time goes on. I grew up watching MTV Spring Break, and so my entire adolescent knowledge base of Spring Break included, Girls Gone Wild, and Jenny McCarthy. In my early twenties, Spring Break entailed getting incredibly drunk, every night, for seven straight nights. By the time I arrived home, my body was in complete shambles, and I needed a vacation...just to recover from vacation.

Now, in my late twenties, spring break means something quite different for me. It will be a time for me to relax, rest, and catch up on my sleep. And, I'm literally thrilled about it.

The days of wet t-shirt contests, and whipped cream bikinis are certainly over. (Just kidding; I never actually participated in a wet t-shirt contest, and have never worn a whipped cream bikini). But, perhaps these life changes are all in par with what it means to be getting older.

I think about the life I used to live in college. Drinking four to five nights a week, scarfing down late night food. (Sidenote: My drunk late night food of choice, after chicken fingers of course, was always New England Clam Chowder). Who the fuck orders New England Clam Chowder after a night of guzzling nine Bacardi and diet Cokes? I'm disgusting.

Now, if I drink (hard) two nights in a row, I am completely done for, and start my week off exhausted. What happened to the old me? Is this called growing up? The college version of myself would not be pleased.

Five years ago on a Friday night, I would be out, drinking my face off, in New York City. (Probably at Tonic). Now, sure, I might go out with friends, but I would also be perfectly content lounging around my apartment, wearing pants with some sort of elastic waist band. The thing is, I accept these changes. In fact, I welcome them. The only frightening thing is imagining where this progression takes me five years from now. There. Now that's scary.

LEAP YEAR!

Oh, heyyy you guys!!!

It's been way too long, and I know it! Stay tuned for a post this weekend. Lylat!

Weekend Updates

Well, it certainly has been a while. It was a great weekend. Last weekend was a great one too. I think that it's time to share that here.

This past weekend was fantastic as we celebrated Shelly Girl's departure from New York and on to California. What could have been better than a night spent with my best friends, dancing our pants off to literally the best music I have ever heard played in a bar? (DJ who works at Lit, marry me?). It was literal perfection. Also, an aside: What are the chances that at this bar were not one, but two different boys from my past. The last time I saw one of them, we were in a bunkbed, the last time I saw the other, it was birthday belligerence. Oh, I adore you, New York City.

Also, a special shoutout to Katiekiwi. Amazing to see a girlfriendbitch.

As for last weekend, well...I must give a great big shootout to Becky O, and her wedding. A night that I knew would be fun, but I had no idea just how much fun I would have, and where that night has led me since. That is all I will say for now, but Becky...Congratulations on your wedding. And, you are my Patti.

A pretty good looking crew, if I do say so myself!

Red Flag

Red Flag: (n). A warning signal. Something that demands attention or provokes an irritated reaction.

As 2011 drew to a close, I learned a very valuable lesson. (One that took me years to learn). It was this: When someone displays red flag behavior, this is a warning signal. It means STOP, immediately. (And run in the other direction). When someone displays this type of behavior, it is not your job to try and fix or change him. It means he is not right for you. Go and find someone who is. Red flags (in dating) are also in conjunction with deal breakers. They are called deal breakers for a reason. It is a non-negotiable, something you cannot ignore, and as stated earlier, provokes an irritated reaction. In the last few months, I have experienced varying degrees of red flag behavior. It's a good thing I know now to remove myself from further contact with these people. I give you the following:

The Freak: I met a thirty-one year old man at a bar, once. And, we have not seen each other since. Since our one time meeting, I often get one word text messages from him that simply say, "Cuddle?" What happens when a thirty-one year old man that you have met once, texts you at seven pm on a weeknight asking you to "Cuddle?" This is a red flag, deal breaker. Freakshow Alert. There is no overcoming this one. Run for your life!

The Flake: If a person cannot commit to making plans, they cannot commit to a friendship or any further type of relationship. If someone flakes on your plans (for a non-legitimate reason), and continues to do so repeatedly, this guy is not worth a minute more of your time. Run for your life!

The Asshole: Okay, so you have a one night stand. You reach out, they don't respond. At some point they reach out, say late one night, and they are now interested in meeting up? Red flag. Anyone who ignores you at any point, is not worth your time. Run for your life!

Why Haven't I Heard From You?

When I was in the seventh grade, my chorus teacher was a single, forty year old woman. Our chorus consisted of seventh and eighth grade boys and girls. But, for one particular song, just the girls would be singing at our upcoming concert. The song was called, "Why Haven't I Heard from You," by Reba McEntire. I've included the lyrics below.

Back in 1876 an ol' boy named Bell

Invented a contraption that we know so well

By the 1950's they were in everybody's home

As a crazy little thing they call the telephone

Now there's one on every corner, in the back of every bar

You can get one in your briefcase, on a plane or in your car

So tell me why, haven't I heard from you

Tell me why, haven't I heard from you

I say now: Darlin', honey, what is your excuse

Why haven't I heard from you

Well there's no problem gettin' to me

Baby you can dial direct

I got call forwarding and call waiting

You can even call collect

The service man he told me that my phone is working fine

And I've come to the conclusion trouble isn't with my line

I'm sure the operator will be glad to put you thru

So dial zero for assistance if this all confuses you

So tell me why, haven't I heard from you

Tell me why, haven't I heard from you

I say now: Darlin', honey, what is your excuse

Why haven't I heard from you

There better been a flood, a landslide of mud

A fire that burns up the wires

And a thunder so loud with a black funnel cloud

A natural disaster I know nothin' about

(Repeat Chorus).

At the time, I didn't understand what on Earth my chorus teacher (or Reba) was talking about. I was thirteen years old, perhaps at the all time height of my popularity. Guys disappear and don't return your calls? Not a chance. My 7th grade boyfriend called me every night before bed. I didn't know what this broad was talking about. Well, fast forward fifteen years later. And, Ms. Washington, I know EXACTLY the tune you're singing. You are singing to the choir. (Literally).

As always, a recent trauma has inspired this blog post. This event was the result of my birthday aftermath, when I received some birthday booty.

I know, bad Lauren. If you want someone to take you seriously/want to see you again/date you in the future, you don't go home with them the first night. I try and live by this rule. However, I have two counter arguments. The first: I have had some successful backwards dates. Dates, that developed after we have both seen each other naked. And, second: It was my birthday. I was ten Bacardi and Diet Cokes deep. I remember nothing about the night. (Literally nothing).

I had no coherent thoughts, telling me to make a better choice. If I had any at all, they would have been, "God, my feet hurt."

This boy was a friend of a friend, and so I thought that put me into a category slightly above one night stand, but I was wrong for thinking that. Not only did I not hear from him again, but when I reached out to him, I received nothing in return. Not even a "Sorry, things are really crazy with work," text. (Subtext: I have no intentions of seeing you again). These texts also suck, but atleast it's a response. If there is any one takeaway in this blog posting, it is this: Do not plain old ignore someone you hooked up with, it is just mean.

The Birthday Blog

Well, here I am. Post Birthday aftermath, with lots of things to say. The first: To everyone who came out and celebrated my birthday on Saturday night, I may not remember you being there, but I love you for coming. I'm pretty sure that the night was a smashing success. And, perhaps the greatest part: While a lady never tells, I will say this: My birthday ended with a bang, literally.

Monday, my first birthday at school since I was twenty-five, was filled with cupcakes, (I ate three), birthday wishes, Facebook messages, birthday gchats, texts and phone calls. You all made my day, maybe even my year. And, as always the real highlight: My lady best friends dinner. Together, convened in an East Village restaurant, I got to spend my birthday with my best gals and my best sister.

It's official. I am in my late twenties. It's scary. But, I am hopeful that this will be a very good year for me. To Everyone who made me feel special, on the first day of my twenty-eighth year...I love you.

What I Have Learned in my Twenty-Seventh Year

With my twenty-eighth birthday looming on the horizon, I thought I'd take a minute and reflect on my twenty-seventh year. In doing this, I re-read some of my blog postings from this past year. Some posts made me laugh, some made me cringe, (I can really be quite disgusting), and a couple made me tear up. Because you see, I had a difficult realization. This past year hasn't been easy. I encountered many disappointments and overcame obstacles both personally and professionally. And hopefully, I'd like to think that I came out of it, a stronger, wiser, and more mature person. I think that I've learned a lot being a twenty-seven year old lady-girl, and I thought I'd share some of these lessons here.

1. Endings are really, really hard. Whether it's a person, or a place. I haven't found an ending that I've liked.

2. If you're not interested in someone romantically, it is best to let them know sooner, rather than later.

3. Don't be afraid to ask your friends for help if you need it. (Even if you feel like you are bothering them. They are your friends for a reason).

4. Pandora, specifically my Sisqo (Yes, singer of the Thong Song), radio station has actually changed my life.

5. It is possible to gain a wealth of knowledge from VH1's Pop Up Video.

6. If someone displays red flag behavior, this does not mean you should view him or her as an exciting challenge, and keep pursuing. It means: Run like hell in the other direction.

7. Gangsta's Paradise is an excellent choice of a karaoke song.

8. The curling iron can work wonders.

9. There is great joy to be found in the sext.

10. If you are invited to a wedding without a date, you will be sat at the miscellaneous table.

11. I love being mistaken for a teenager.

12. The cast of Glee can sing anything, and my body will immediately be covered in chills.

13. If a guy asks you on a date to the movies, and then asks you to pay for both of your tickets, do not go out with him again.

14. You can never be too old to make out in a bunk bed.

15. When you wear feathers in your hair, you and nine year old girls will share the same fashion trends.

16. The average person poops 416 pounds a year.

17. The Real Housewives of NYC, New Jersey and Beverly Hills is addicting. How did I ever live without these shows?

18. Patti, the Millionaire Matchmaker is surprisingly wise.

19. When a mother of one of your students offers to buy your class a pet, politely decline. (Welcome to the 4th grade, Sparky).

20. And lastly, if you accidentally leave jewelry at a one night stand's apartment, please prepare to never see that jewelry again.

We Love Camp Schodack. So...put another dime in our jukebox, baby?

An Unexpected Beginning to 2012...

I've learned two very important things in this new year. The first is this: It's okay to ask for help if you need it, especially from those that love you. And, the second: Your health is really the most important thing, without it, it doesn't matter what else you have. With each new year, I usually say "I can't believe it's (insert new year here)." But, this time I mean it. And, that's because I didn't get to experience a true New Years Eve celebration. (Or atleast, the first time since 1989--the first New Years I have an actual memory of). Though, I had plans to ring in the New Year with friends, my intestines had other plans for me. Instead of celebrating, I spent my new year, sleeping on the floor of my bathroom, fighting off the most evil stomach virus I have ever encountered. Allow me to set the stage.

Last week, with my time off, I spent many a night going out, drinking and staying up late. As a teacher, I rarely get the opportunity to stay out late and booze on a weeknight. I took full advantage of this during my vacation. But, by Friday night my body started to feel off. And, I just didn't feel like myself. I thought, okay. I'm not twenty-one anymore. Maybe I just can't hang the way I used to. But, by the time I got home on Friday night I knew it was much more serious than that. I had a one hundred and two fever, fit with chills, sweats, and painful body aches. By six in the morning--this moved to my stomach. And, I became very sick to my stomach. I will spare you the disgusting details. (And yes, they are disgusting). But, I could not keep anything down. Anything. Out of either exit. The nausea/pooping occurred every ten minutes for two days straight. There was no waste left to leave my body! In the last two days, I had only eaten an apple, three crackers, one bowl of chicken noodle soup and one slice of toast. In two days!!!! And, keep in mind--my daily breakfast is usually 4-5 bowls of Frosted flakes!

By Sunday night, I was so weak I could hardly move. Even watching television required too much energy. I had never felt this sick or miserable in my almost twenty-eight years. I was completely dehydrated, despite the massive amounts of water and Gatorade that I had consumed. I called my doctor. He told me I needed to go to the emergency room, and get hydrated via an IV. I was scared.

First, I didn't think I could make it to the hospital without vomiting, or even worse--crapping my pants. Second, I looked uglier than I did in 1999--I was afraid to be seen in public looking like this! Third, I didn't know if I had the physical strength to get dressed, lock up my apartment, and get in a cab. Somehow, (and I'll never quite know how), I managed to get myself to the hospital. Upon arrival, I was immediately put into a wheelchair. I was so weak at this point, I could hardly stand. Yes, this was a low moment. And, not just physically, but emotionally too. I felt very lonely being at the hospital myself. Yes, I should have asked a friend to come with me, but I didn't want to be a bother. (Lesson Learned: Be a bother). But, I could not get the thought out of my head. If I weren't single, I would not have been at that hospital alone. In the end, I wasn't alone--my mom met me from New Jersey, and once the IV filled with fluids, anti nausea medicine and pain killers kicked in, I felt much better.

This morning, I woke up feeling energized and more like myself than I have in days. I felt happy. I didn't have to walk around taking tiny old lady steps, I could dance and sing around my apartment, naked. I was me again. And, for the first time since this year started, when I wished someone a happy New Year, I meant it--it really feels happy.