When Do You Tell?

This blog post is dedicated to ABBS. I love you.

A couple of years ago, I was at a bar with one of my female friends, a wingwoman if you will. My wingwoman for the evening was an excellent one. She had just one drawback. She was not single. Her being in a relationship does not stop her from being a good wingwoman, except for one thing. Any two-some of guys that approached us would eventually lose interest in talking to us because she had a boyfriend. I'm not saying, I wasn't enough to hold someone's attention. (Thank you, very much). But, the two guys came as a package deal, and as far as they were concerned, onto the next duo where both girls were actually single.

Learning from her mistake, (of saying she had a boyfriend in the first thirty seconds of a conversation), she decided to keep that information to herself a while longer. Shortly after a duo of boys approached us. I found someone that I kinda liked. We were starting to really hit it off. And, what happened next is a tale for another time. But, what about my friend and guy # 2? Well, I'm sure he thought that they were hitting it off too, until an hour into the conversation when she revealed that she had a boyfriend. Poor guy. He never had a chance, and he never saw it coming. And all he got was a bar tab of drinks for a girl who already had a boyfriend.

And, so. My question is this: In a social situation, (be it, a bar or a party), when you are talking to someone for more than just a quick conversation, when do you tell them that you're in a relationship? When this occurs too soon into the conversation, you sound presumptuous and arrogant. But, if this occurs too late into the conversation, there is nothing more frustrating. There simply has to be a happy medium. But, what is it?

I am writing form the perspective of a single person (as per usual). And, I'm not knocking the coupled off person either, it's tough for them too. Don't they have a right to talk to other human beings? And, I'm sure their first instinct is not to say "I have a (girl/boy)friend/fiance/wife/husband"
1. Nothing ends a conversation quicker.
2. Like I said earlier: Reveal this too quickly, and I think we're all likely to think: Relax asshole. I'm not trying to get into your pants.

On the flipside, if you buy me drinks, and talk to me for too long, knowing you're in a relationship? Well, then I want to murder you a little.

Recently, a friend of mine spent two hours of her evening talking to a guy that she had met that night at a bar. They were talking, laughing, and just generally having a good time. Then the unthinkable happened. The guy dropped the girlfriend bomb. TWO HOURS INTO THE CONVERSATION. That is too late, pal! When a girl meets a boy at a bar that she likes, she thinks: Omg, I just met my future husband!!

I'm just kidding. Girls don't actually think that. But, we do get excited to be talking to a handsome stranger.

Should people in relationships have conversations with single people at bars or parties? Yes, of course. But, should there be a cut-off time before hopes are raised and crushed? Yes, I think there should be. But, what is that cut off time? I don't know. Do you?